Homage To Elders, Honouring Our Ancestors Heals Our Lives and The World

This week I am writing from Assos, where Aristotle lived, taught and raised a family for a while.  Here I am visiting my mother.  It coincides with a special celebratory holiday following a month-long fasting that encourages strengthening familial ties by making peace with our family members and acquaintances.  This is also a time where ancestors are honoured by visiting their tombs.   I am not a blind follower of tradition; quite the contrary I question the meaning and the consequences of traditional practices.  This year is the first year I am experiencing the true meaning of paying homage to my elders. I discovered how honouring our ancestors heals our lives and the world.

Remembering As a Way Of Honouring Our Ancestors

Honoring our ancestors is a practice used in many cultures.  In Africa they say that you can only know who you are if you can call the names of your ancestors going back seven generations. Remembering is preserving the history of a family lineage and the memory of the family who brought us to this world, nourished us and created the conditions for our existence.

It is a duty based on the belief that when we die we continue to exist.  It is also believed that spirits have the ability to look after the living and to influence their fortune.  Paying homage to our elders allows us seeking our ancestors’ wisdom, guidance and assistance for us.

We honour by remembering.  Remembering also opens up a communication channel with our personal history which shapes so much of our conscious and unconscious identity.  As you think on how a relative would respond with a problem or simply by directly asking their advice you might receive some guidance in the form of intuitions, images, dreams or meetings with people with answers.

Elders’ Shortcomings As The Symbols of Our Ancestors’ Sufferings

As a family therapist I witness horror stories of abuse, neglect, suffering and a lot of pain as well as care, joy, solidarity and fun in families.  Despite all the mistakes and damage they might have created in our parents and in us we need to acknowledge that our ancestors have done their best.  It is our duty to do our best in return in order to improve their legacy for future generations.

For us humans, life in this realm seems to be like a sea journey where the waves are emotions and peaceful calmness comes through conscious understanding and acceptance.  When this happens we keep our mind, body and spirit in good condition and in harmony with each other.  This leads to naturally appreciating our ancestors.  Showing our gratitude to our parents and elders when they are alive despite their shortcomings often does not always come to us easily.  It took me, for example, years of emotional turmoil.

Honouring Our Ancestors As A Healing Practice

Here are the steps you can take in order to heal your life through remembering and honouring your ancestors:

1) Think about the characteristics you need to nurture in your development as a person; such as courage, creativity, honesty, reliability, perseverance, compassion, balance and other qualities you may need.

2) Examine your ancestors who are associated with these qualities.  These ancestors may be your heroes as role models as well as scapegoats who were judged and excluded as thieves, liars, addicts, hence represent these qualities by living their opposites.

3) Emotions towards our ancestors have a mass that influence our daily experiences.  If these emotions include anger, hate, disappointment, mistrust and jealousy we feel lost, and pure joy for our existence evades us. Therefore use Hooponopono to cleanse your ancestors deeds.  Repeat:

I am sorry

I apologise

I thank you

I love you

4) Honour your elders and ancestors for what they were able to achieve.  Give your blessing and ask theirs.

You will receive guidance from your ancestors as you follow your intuition, through coincidences in your life and your dreams.  This is very healing for you and healing oneself is the one and the only way I know of healing the world.