Use Five Step Formula To Find A Partner For Life
An adolescent or a young person may not be looking for a partner for life. However later in life, when all your peers start getting wedded and having kids it might become more difficult to sustain the same busy social life. I realise that sometimes heart breaking experiences with partners can be so discouraging that hopelessness can set in. Here I will give you a five step formula to overcome your fears and to find a partner for life.
Of course there are no guarantees in life. Over our lifespan we change. There is no perfect partner. Rather your partner is the perfect one for you as you will be helping each other grow.
Recognising A Partner For Life
Do you ever wonder why we are attracted to certain people and not to others? We might think we make our choices consciously but often a lot of unconscious processes determine what happens in our intimate relationships.
If you analyse the people you feel attracted to, as Imago Therapy points out, you will find that they fit with you like puzzle pieces. They may be attractive because either they appear to be the opposite of your angry and unsupportive or demanding parent or similar to them. They may carry some positive or not so liked characteristic of a person who has shaped who you have become.
I believe that unconsciously we are attempting to heal ourselves from the effects of our parents’ inadequacies. How come even though we might be attracted to several people we settle with only one, if we can? That is a big IF because as a result of a heart breaking romantic experience your unconscious might attempt to protect you by undermining your efforts of being involved. The person with whom we match is the perfect match for healing each other, first by filling our emotional gaps, then by allowing us to fill those gaps ourselves.
Five Step Formula To Overcome Fears and To Find A Partner For Life
The first step towards opening yourself to meet your partner for life is to look at how you view your past experiences. Realise that they have prepared you to recognise and appreciate your partner for life when you meet them. They also helped you to mature and shaped your expectations.
- Therefore embrace the pain of your heart breaks, feel gratitude as you realise that it helped you to gather the knowledge for making more conscious choices.
- Next, use the power of words. Focus on what you want rather than what you don’t want in your partner for life.
- Even though we know that commitment grows over time, prepare yourself to be influenced from each other’s views and to change accordingly.
- Explore your aspirations about finances, kids, career, also especially in relation to your respective families.
- Develop a sense of contentment with who you are right now at a deep level.
Of course there are no guarantees in life. Over our lifespan we change. There is no perfect partner. Rather your partner is the perfect one for you as you will be helping each other grow. Trust that you have a ‘perfectly matching’ partner just for you. Only after doing your work of being in harmony with your horse than you should let your unconscious make the choice for you.
Why not register from here for the Free Turkish Online Seminar ‘Sweet and Bitter Faces of Love’ where Nilgün and I answer your questions about Love which will be followed by 4 week online group.
Attribution 2.0 Generic (CC BY 2.0)image:Emran Kassim
