Help Your Child Learn From Mistakes
Children grow by learning. Sure they make mistakes, and sometimes it takes a while for them to learn from their errors. Here is a very simple but very powerful tool to help your child learn over time to self regulate and manage their behaviour.
Help your child learn from their errors mistakes by actively engaging the executive centers of their brain: Give them feedback, set limits whilst making sure they feel SAFE, LOVED and CARED.
Invest On Your Child’s Thinking Brain
Your child needs quality feedback to learn the consequences of their behaviour.
Shouting, angry outbursts or threats only escalate the negativity between you and them; more importantly your child’s ability to use their thinking brain diminishes. As they go into survival mode children withdraw, so they do not learn and get stuck in their errors.
Creating The Optimum Context For Learning
Learning occurs as a result of actively engaging the executive centres of the brain. What engages the brain is heightened attention when it becomes aware of a mistake and the constructive feedback that follows. Safety in the way your child’s attention is drawn to the error and feedback is offered, is what makes the difference between trauma and learning.
The only way you can give your feedback in order to help your child learn and mature is by making sure your child feels SAFE, LOVED and CARED about by you. It is their experience, however, of whether they feel SAFE, LOVED and CARED for that counts.
Maturity is a slow process. As parents you need to communicate in a way appropriate to your child’s age, as well as to be patient and persistent. When you are overtaken by conflict, use your empathy skills to set clear limits in a way your child feels SAFE, LOVED and CARED for by you.
Attribution 2.0 Generic (CC BY 2.0)image:Tony Alter
